After SPM I was really keen on searching high n low for my tertiary education… KL TARC, KDU,
In my thoughts, college life will be really cool as there is no more school uniform for me…And yes, NO MORE IRONING! No more strict rules…I’ll get my total freedom…Perhaps it is just my thoughts when I’m still in high school…When I enter college, it is totally a different case…I have to crack my head on what to wear on that day… Well, nowadays I don’t really matter on my outfit anymore…I’ll just grab whatever I see and slip on my sneakers n off to college…Staying back in Penang while having college life is neither fun too…Anywhere I go, whatever I do, I’ve to report back home, I mean I have to tell mum where am I or what am I going to do during weekends when I’m out of Penang too but there’s limitation…I’ve got to be back before 2330, can’t stay up late till 2 or 3 in the morning to study or just for fun…*get what I mean?*
Classes after classes, hours after hours of lectures, practical lab work, tutorials, day after day…Of course, all work but no play make ME a dull college teenage girl…My group of friends were outgoing, nice people…All of them had painted my college life with lots of colours with darker shades and lighter ones as some are sour and bitter painful moments with some sweet moments every now and then…I’ve never enjoyed myself to this fullest throughout my 17 years and 10 months of life…Skipping classes especially Moral and Pengajian Malaysia almost every week, studied in the library, watched movies together, hung out together, having the same old question everyday- WHERE TO FOR LUNCH over the past 6-7 months [approximately 2 more months left]…
Truthfully, I’ve never thought of getting into any relationship so soon as I always see and hear my friends’ stories…Obviously sweet moments they shared with each other made me envy but when they were facing problems with each other and when they relate their stories to me really SCARED me…However, I couldn’t control this feeling of mine when I met this guy from my class…He is pretty smart, generous, and so on [can’t think of any now]…Knowing each other for few months, I indeed stepped into a relationship with him…
“I’m not used to having someone that close to me”
“Don’t worry, is just another person always by your side.”
Well, he is so far the one who really cares, loves and pampers me like a child…He sacrificed a lot for me, no matter in time, money or effort…I’ve never regret to have him as my first boyfriend anyway…He added extra colours into my new college life…He brighten up my life…He is just like a burning candle…After a month plus, everything comes to an end…It ended just like …
“I’m sorry…I think is better we become friends” no other words were said…
It was the hardest moment to go through in my entire life…Well, I’m prepared to face it well before it happened…If I’m prepared to start the relationship, I must be prepared for the worst too, right? Maybe I just couldn’t let go when I still don’t really know what has went wrong, where’s the main cause although I know I’m the one who caused it… *sigh*
Nowadays, we just can’t sit down and talk to each other…Even if we really talk to each other, it will just be Maths and nothing else…He does not really care about me anymore…NOT AT ALL…He does not even cheer me up when I’m not in my mood or down…Is it really mean that when one breaks up with another one, there won’t be anymore conversation at all? Not even a normal casual talk? Whatever I do irritates him…So ironic…I can’t fight back, there’s no point for me to do so too…All I can do now is to swallow everything down even is a huge lump of solid food or whatever with bones and so on…
After months of struggle to get out from the dark room, finally I manage to walk into the bright world again…Losing someone precious without reasons… [I do hope I’ll get the answer one day] I’m not ready for any new one yet, sorry guys, you have to wait…1 year? 2 years? Maybe 3 years…It all depends on my will power…
Anyway, I’m enjoying my life now…However, there’s still conflicts between the whole group of us…The whole group of more than 10 of us is getting smaller slowly day by day…Floorball outing was the best moment as everyone really enjoyed themselves…That’s the one and only outing all of us enjoyed happily…Recently, some of us talk to each other like strangers as if we knew each other like yesterday or an hour ago…
Whatever it is, I’m hoping that we all can still remain as friends, keeping in touch with each other, updating the latest news of them, wherever they are, whatever they are doing… Let every moment be a lesson or a memory to be deeply engraved in my mind and heart then…a BIG thank you to all of you who shared every precious college moment with me, the unforgettable WORLD CUP gathering in SC’s house and also support me all the way in everything I do…My first year of college life was indeed interesting though although I failed my first semester with “flying colours”…Sorry sis, I know I’ve disappoint you but I’m not the only one retaking all the subjects…Is about 90% of my intake students did that…
A test tube costs RM2.50…
A Biology exam slide costs RM13 something…
Retaking all the papers costs extra of RM65…3 papers = RM170; 6 papers = RM 235…
Total tuition fees paid… Some thousands of Ringgit…
Total exam fees paid…Some hundreds of Ringgit…
Pure fun with all my college buddies is PRICELESS…No matter how much money we have, we can’t buy back those pure fun we had anymore…There’s no turning back for time…
Some messages to few of you…
~ You [you know who you are, I knew you never want your name to be published]
- Thanks for being there for me whenever I need you…I really appreciate what you have done for me…All the best to you in finding your next right person…Love you always…I mean as in friends…Take care dear…
~ Valerine
- Thank you for comforting and supporting me day and night when I’m facing problems…I don’t really know what is going on between all of us but I hope the gap between everyone can be closed up…All the best to you too…Bless you with your Mr right happily together and treasure every moment…
~ Cecilia
- Thank you for counselling me at times lately…Talked to me, shared our thoughts…Be a good nurse!!! Many people will be really glad to have your hand lent to them…I’ll be waiting to see your twins… =)
~ Eveline
- We don’t really have much conversation along the year but I still got to thank you for accompanying me at times, especially when we skipped chemistry lectures and also for leading us in Spirit of
~ Leo
- I’m so sorry when your ear got to suffer to my nonsense for so long…Thank you for lending your ear to me and also accompany me when i'm in total stressed up! I’ve already met my target, don’t have to worry much bout me anymore…Study hard ya…Achieve your basketball dreams in Singapore…You can do it…Never say die, fight till the end…
~ Wei Lin
- You are the one who can really accompany me to talk nonsense now…Haha…With all your new philosophy and inventions that b = d, bear = dear…Let the Bear I wish = my Dear then or should I say, Let the Dear I wish = my Bear?? [Maths equation]…GooDness gracious, I can’t imagine my kiBs-to-De…Have fun in
~ Deon
- Thank you too…You helped me several times in my studies too and also a member of Spirit of Penang to make the head counts, to give me the chance for joining this race…
~ Jacqueline
- Thank you for sending me to college and bring me home…Enjoy yourselves wherever you are…Don’t give up on your violin…=)
~ Esther
- You know…The day you told me you are going to leave DISTED to AIMST, I cried non stop…You are the one who can really accompany me to talk nonsense no matter in which class…Anyway, thank you too…Thanks for being there with me in all those boring lectures…Miss you…
I hereby to wish everyone of you, no matter your names are listed above or not, as long as you are reading this blog of mine, all the best in your future undertakings…Take care and do keep in touch… *wink*
My next destination of tertiary education will most probably be in INTI COLLEGE MALAYSIA (ICM)…A very remote place in Nilai, Negeri Sembilan… I guess there won’t be anymore question for me to ask when I’m there such as WHERE TO FOR LUNCH and WHERE ARE WE GOING NEXT…Perhaps questions like WHAT TO EAT TODAY or HOW MUCH HAVE I STUDIED SO FAR will more likely to pop up in my mind as there is no other places for me to search for lunch except the cafeteria there unless I cook myself…Real college life is going to start soon…Staying in the hostel, hand washing my laundry, fight with the cold water early in the morning, budget my expenses etc…I have to be independent from now on…No more Gurney for movies and Redbox, Tesco for groceries shopping with you guys, Giant for groceries shopping with dad n mum, no car to drive around…I’m going to miss mummy, daddy, bro, sis, didi, my devil poodle, Rusty and of course my bed, hot water bath and Penang food!!
Contact me anytime, anywhere…
Handphone num: you have to get from me, if you don’t have mine… 012 & 017
MSN: e_wen88@hotmail.com
Yahoo Messenger: winniethepooh2710@yahoo.com
Skype: e_wen88
Email: e_wen88@hotmail.com
If ever you all want to send larger files to me, you all can send it to my gmail account, michellelam88@gmail.com
Remember all your webcams and microphones ready for the video conferencing with me ya!!! Upload all your latest photos to update me too…
Last but not least, I’m really sorry if I have offended any of you throughout the year…SORRY!!!
Going to miss you people heaps…Hugs and kisses…Love all of you out there…God bless…
~michelle.lam~ (“,)
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